However you are feeling, it is likely to be reflected in your behavior. Behavioral difficulties cover everything from blushing or nail biting through to hair pulling and self harm. These behaviors probably have meaning that perhaps cannot be expressed in any other way; eg: blushing may be an outlet for otherwise unacceptable emotion. Self harm could be about self punishment or relief or articulation of emotional pain. They may, over time, have become purely habit but you may feel embarrassed about the behavior or its consequences. Whatever form or meaning this behavior takes, it is probably time to do something about it.
You may want to also look at the pages on self esteem and confidence, eating disorders weight and addiction, depression or anxiety.
Phobias often result in altered behavior either in reaction to the feared thing or in avoidance of it. Phobias differ from ‘ordinary' fear through their irrationality and their encapsulation. It is illogical so logic (eg: plane crash statistics) does not address it. Furthermore, the phobia is very specific and contained within its own world. The phobic person may be happy and content apart from this issue. The most common phobias are flying, tube trains, lifts, enclosed places or places that are difficult to get out of. These may overlap as they are often all expressions of claustrophobia. Alternately, one of these situations may trigger reminders of the problematic one and so ‘catch' it. Heights, driving, insects and vegetables are also fairly common. Actually, people can become phobic of absolutely anything. A phobia can significantly impact on life, particularly if the feared thing crops up frequently, and can be very distressing and disabling.
Working with phobias usually involves first de-sensitising the feelings around the phobia using relaxation and visualisation techniques in order to be able to discover its origins and pull it out by the roots.
Behavioral difficulties cover such a wide remit that that it is not possible to suggest specific techniques here for working with them but safe to say that…
ANYTHING THAT HAS BEEN LEARNED CAN BE UN-LEARNED
AND
SOMETHING DIFFERENT LEARNED IN ITS PLACE
…and all these behaviors have been learned.
Smoking is included on this page rather than on the page about addiction, even though it is said to be one of the most difficult addictions to kick. Seeing it as a behavior rather than an addiction puts it in a new light and offers a more constructive approach to changing it. Change it you can. But only if you really want to (see special tip below).
Here are some tools and suggestions:
- Buy Suzanne 's double relaxation CD, Adventures in Relaxation, and listen daily to one or other of the half hour relaxationadventures every day with the aim of giving yourself a mini holiday.
- A good book: Agree to Win: Essential Steps to Negotiate in Your Work and Life, by Hugh Willbourn
- Talk to someone. Talk to a friend but, if it has been going on for a while or seems particularly distressing or is impacting on your life, consider seeking professional help. See your GP. You can come to see Suzanne . You will find contact details right here on this website. If you live too far away to consult Suzanne, go to the National Council for Hypnotherapy or the General Hypnotherapy Register websites to find a well qualified hypnotherapist in your area.
Suzanne's Package to Become A Non-smoker
Suzanne is interested in helping people to become a non-smoker rather than to simply ‘give up'. If you stop to think about it, there is an subtle but important difference.
The BIG question is …
DO YOU REALLY WANT TO?
If you really want to, Suzanne can certainly help you to do what you want to do. She cannot (and would not want to), make you do something you do not really want to do but simply think you should or someone else thinks you should.
Whatever you foresee as stumbling blocks - do not worry. If you really want to become a non-smoker YOU CAN.
The Package
You will see Suzanne three times with any necessary follow ups within three months that you need (there should not be any!). Contact her to discuss further.